Wednesday, January 13, 2010


Avoidance. This is what I have been doing.
Last Tuesday, January 5 - I was fully prepared to post Jack's 8 month post and then was hoping to post about Hannah passing court. But, she didn't. This put a huge damper on my day/week. Mark and I got an email in the morning saying that her court date had been rescheduled due to some paperwork missing. It was not just our case but several cases that were rescheduled - but that didn't do much to make me feel better.

I went to bed and woke up thinking "Today is the day, she will be officially be my daughter." And I found out that we will be waiting until January 29th for her new court date. I cried. I am sad and disappointed. It will delay our travel plans by a month. A month goes by fairly quickly most of the time. But a month in her little life is a long time. It is one more month that I do not know her or get to see her growing and changing. It is one more month that I will not be able to hold her, kiss her, and whisper in her ear how much I love her.

I have been encouraged by the prayers and kind words of so many friends through out the last week. One in particular:

"Prayers for you all and Hannah- the waitin and wondering is so hard.
Remember the words to How Great Thou Art:
Strength for today
Bright hope for tomorrow
Great is His faithfulness"

That is what I am holding onto. Praying for strength for each "today" and renewed hope for all the tomorrows that stand in the way between now and when she comes to be with us.

And now I will pull myself out of my blog funk, stop avoiding, and get around to posting Jack's 8 month.

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